Wednesday, January 25, 2012

1.25.12

My heart aches tonight, for two mamas in particular...one whose baby valiantly fought for his health for five months in and out of nicu and picu and lost the fight last night; and another mama who lost her son when her water broke way too early and her little G left this world after 37 minutes in her arms.

Again, I shake my fists at the heavens, I smash things in my head, I yell and kick and cry and sob at the unfairness of all of this.  I've had a lump in my throat all day since I heard about Auggie, and when I finally came home from work tonight I burst into tears while telling E about this horrible loss.  Just last weekend, I burst into tears telling him about another dear friend who was in L&D with a baby that would never come home with her.

It will never make sense, no matter how many of these stories I hear.

I miss Otis with a fierce sadness every day. As I put Owen down to bed each night, I stare at his brother's picture, and wish that they both could be here with us.


For Auggie and Jill, for Gavin and Jen, for all the mamas missing their babies tonight:



6 comments:

SG said...

It shocks me every time another baby dies. I mean, the world stopped right when Elizabeth died and I thought surely never ever would something so shattering ever happen again on earth. But it does every day. Thinking of the families whose loss is so raw right now <3

-Jen- said...

Sarah- Having your support has been amazing this last week....and when I lost Eli and Levi....and through all of the other miscarriages and general insanity. I hope you know how much I value this friendship. I hate that we are in this club together.

Brooke said...

Too many heartbreaks to contemplate without tears.

cullensblessings said...

Tears.....

Renel said...

It is so hard...all the saddness all the miss. It is just so unfair. Everytime I hear of another mama I think...when will this ever stop...and know it won't because it is a really shitty part of life. I recently read Snowflower and the secret fan....I didn't realize how many babies died in the book before I read it. I realize that women have always lost children, this is not new, I just would assume that there would be less with all the advancements we have had in technology. It is forever heartbreaking. Sending all the mamas a hug from my heart.

Alex said...

Oh, much too sad.

Jen, I love you. I'm here for you, my sweet friend.